Drake feat. 2 Chainz, Big Sean and Aziz Ansari - All Me

The first day of August (whew, that’s gonna take some getting used to) brings us All Me, the new track from Drake, 2 Chainz, Big Sean and……Aziz Ansari? Don’t worry, as much as I’d like to hear Aziz (or RAAAAAAAANDY) drop a few bars, only one of his lines from the movie Funny People is sampled here. The other three hold it down, per usual. Drake is giving a us a pretty remarkable lesson in timing by dropping song after song [weeks after Kanye, Cole, Wale and Jay] as we inch closer to September 17th and Nothing Was the Same. Check out All Me:

Speaking of Drake, was that whole album cover situation ever sorted out? God, I sure hope not.

Oh, and here's the sampled clip from Funny People, for all of your Aziz Ansari enjoyment.

J.R. Smith [Parody] - So Right [Video]

OK, so I realize it's March 27th and we're literally in the heart of March Madness. All energy and focus should be on the Sweet 16. I get this. But every once in awhile we come across something so majestic, so glorious—if you will—that it just can't wait. This video definitely qualifies. Now, I don't know who to thank [or more appropriately, blame] for this song and video inspired by J.R. Smith, everyone's favorite sharpshooting black hole/booty twitpic'er, but seriously, Thank You. Special shout out to the internet. And upon further review, I'm not 100% convinced that this wasn't made by J.R. Smith himself. Behold:

So, again, I'm not sure who deserves the praise for this amazing song/video but there is one thing we all can be confident of: J.R. Smith's Gonna J.R. Smith.

Russell Westbrook, You Are My Hero

I haven't been blogging for awhile. I don't really have much of an excuse other than I've focusing on work and side projects here and there. But every once in awhile, there's something—a song, event or video—that always seems to bring me back. This time, we can thank Russell Westbrook for my favorite video since this. Thank you, Russ. Thank you.

Project X [Trailer]

Yo....

This looks insane. I know where I'll be on March 2^nd.
At first I was mad that this didn't come out when I was 17 but then after thinking about it, it's good that this wasn't out then. If it had come out when I was 17 I would have probably said: Timing is everything.

Even Herman Cain Would Laugh At This

Unless you were living under a rock this weekend, I'm sure you saw that Herman Cain decided to suspend his presidential campaign. Man, so sad...oh well. What's a more fitting way to bid farewell to everyone's favorite least favorite politician than with a hilarious voice over video? This is arguably one of the funniest things I've seen in all of 2011. Embarrassingly enough, I actually thought it was real for the first 10 seconds. I promise you can't watch this without laughing.

"Everybody needs toucan stubs."

Epic Meal Time: West Coast Burger Pile x Double Barrell 12 Gauge Hot Dog

The guys from Epic Meal Time are back again to show us exactly how we'd eat....if we were gods. First up, the West Coast Burger Pile. It looks like the things that dreams are made of. I'm pretty sure my man Wimpy would have a coronary.

"Jesus Christ, there's so many GD burgers."
Next up, the 12 Gauge Hot Dog. There's just something about 50 cent hot dogs, bacon and Jack Daniels that makes this irresistible.
"Ketchup...not that special. Oh wait, there's Jack? It's fuckin special now, player."

These guys really should release a cookbook. These meals always look amazing.

But maybe the half naked girl laying down bacon strips had something to do with that.


Did I mention that there's bacon????

Workaholics. You Should Be Watching This Show

In the class of must-see tv shows, it's easy for a show like Workaholics to get lost in the shuffle that is Entourage, True Blood and uh, Martin. Workaholics is basically a comedy centered around three roommates that work at the same telemarketing company. Might sound like any other show but it's actually quite funny. In a slightly awkward, Curb Your Enthusiasm-meets-frat row type way. Check out a scene

There's more where that came from.

And they signed for a second season. Swag.

Jonah Hill in The Sitter [Trailer/NSFW]

Aight cool, a new Jonah Hill movie. Can't be mad at that. It's called The Sitter and to me it looks like a cross between Daddy Day Care, Pineapple Express and 30 Minutes or Less...even though I've only seen one of those movies. I figured that this would hold us over until Allen Gregory comes out but it looks like the movie won't be out until December. Either way, should be pretty dope.

Definitely, I repeat, definitely some NSFW language in this joint fyi...

Speaking of 30 Minutes or Less, I know where I'll be Friday night. Unh.

Beautiful Swear Words

Call me ignorant, call me immature, call me whatever but I'm a strong proponent of the idea that curse words can make just about anything funnier.

If you agree, [which you should] then you'll be just as happy as I was when I found the website beautifulswearwords.com. I mean, it's not much. It's basically just a collection of illustrations of swear words presented elegantly enough to be embroidered on your grandmother's favorite pillow or even worn on your favorite t-shirt.

Go ahead, pick your favorite.

I'm going with either the red and yellow "Shiiit" or the black and white "Bullshit."
But that was an easy decision.



Stay classy, awr.

Tom Haverford [Aziz Ansari] Food Nicknames Generator

Ever since seeing Aziz Ansari on Human Giant and catching his Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening stand-up, I've been an insanely huge fan. His character on Parks & Recreation, Tom Haverford, is pretty much Parks & Rec's version of Dwight from The Office. One of the best scenes with him was him listing his nicknames for foods. Observe:

Of course, there's a website for this and only this. TomHaverfoods.com is just a food nickname generator that works at the click of a mouse. Early favorites are below. Check it out for yourself though.

Yea, definitely worth about 5 minutes of internet time.

And for the record, that's one hour.

Biggie Drive Thru Prank

I swear I was laughing out loud at this. I don't want to give away too much, just watch it. And if you don't know the lines, first slap yourself then click here. Damn, this was funny.

"Your crew run run run, your crew run run."

TOO Funny: Dance Assassin

Why is this so funny?????? I literally laughed out loud the entire time. Just watch:

hahahaha

Martin Was My Jam.

But THIS....we DON'T need...





...at all.

Black Friday.

I can't think about Black Friday without thinking of this scene from Zack & Miri Make a Porno. Craig Robinson is funny as shit.

Like I said last year, shop all you want just watch for the Gank Move.

"....a MUTHAF#$*!N raincoat?!"

Admittedly random, but this is one of my favorite scenes in Boondocks history. Observe.

I gotta get back on my Boondocks shit.

Comedy Origins: Dave Chappelle

It's crazy what you find on the internet. This morning I came across these early videos of a young Dave Chappelle getting started in the comedy business. It's wild to see how far he's gotten with his craft. The first set of videos was from an old performance on Caroline's on Broadway back in 1990. The second group come from a 1993 appearance on Comic Justice. What a difference three years makes. Still funny as shit nonetheless:

Caroline's on Broadway - 1990


Comic Justice - 1993

We really need Dave Chappelle back.

Human Giant: Rollerblading

I'm trying to wait for the day when this isn't funny. That day isn't today.

Aziz is still the man. VMAs on Sunday manggg.

Random NBA Awesomeness: Detlef Schrempf on Parks and Recreation

I have no idea how I missed this. Parks and Rec is a funny ass show.

For the rest of the deleted scenes, go here.

Power Hour. [Kanye West Power Parody]

This is amazing for a number of reasons. Mainly because of how close it looks to the actual Power video. And then again just because of its sheer awesomeness. All my bros and brostitutes out there should dig it.


Kanye West himself can't even get mad at this one.

"Makes My Dookie Twinkle."

Just a reminder of how fucking funny Dave Chappelle was/is.