J.R. Smith [Parody] - So Right [Video]

OK, so I realize it's March 27th and we're literally in the heart of March Madness. All energy and focus should be on the Sweet 16. I get this. But every once in awhile we come across something so majestic, so glorious—if you will—that it just can't wait. This video definitely qualifies. Now, I don't know who to thank [or more appropriately, blame] for this song and video inspired by J.R. Smith, everyone's favorite sharpshooting black hole/booty twitpic'er, but seriously, Thank You. Special shout out to the internet. And upon further review, I'm not 100% convinced that this wasn't made by J.R. Smith himself. Behold:

So, again, I'm not sure who deserves the praise for this amazing song/video but there is one thing we all can be confident of: J.R. Smith's Gonna J.R. Smith.

Florida Gulf Coast: Every Day is a Dunk Contest; Plus: Awesome Trainer Guy

DeShawn Stephens (23) was actually wearing Jordans when this happened. Man, the irony.
What Florida Gulf Coast's basketball team has accomplished so far in the NCAA Tournament is nothing short of amazing: Beating a highly favored and second-seeded Georgetown, becoming the first 15 seed to make the Sweet 16 (and Elite 8?!) and capturing numerous opponents' souls [see: DeShawn Stephens] in the process. Amazing. I really hope this team keeps rolling especially as they take on in-state powerhouse (and team that continuously grinds my gears) Florida.

At this point, I'm not even sure if I'm rooting for FGCU for the yearly Cinderella/David vs. Goliath storyline or for the sheer amount of dunks that they put up. Yeah, it's most likely the dunks. And the craziest part is, dunking is nothing new for this group. While I highly suggest checking out every [literally every] dunk from FGCU's 2013 Postseason (courtesy of Deadspin), you should also check out a Dunk Contest that the team held for fans earlier this season. There's some pretty jaw-dropping stuff here. Especially when you consider that these guys are probably just as well known as say, Jeremy Evans. Check it out.

So, Florida Gulf Coast, keep the streak going. If not for me and the thousands of college basketball fans that are cheering you on, then do it for Awesome Trainer Guy. He truly deserves it.

Update: This needed to be shared:

awr March Madness Picks – Explained Mostly With .GIFs

Ok, I gotta make this quick. Mainly because the NCAA Tournament starts tomorrow afternoon and I have to be up for work in less than five hours. (Clearly I wrote this Wednesday night.) Ok, so like literally everyone else out that takes place in any March Madness Bracket Pools, I don’t have a direct science on how to pick these teams. Obviously. Because if I did, I’d be quite wealthy and I definitely wouldn’t be working 60 hour weeks while having second thoughts on that 7th Jack & Coke on Wednesday. For the record, I’d probably live in mansion in Miami and be Future’s European Tour Manager. I’ve gotten too far off track. Now, for my bracket.

I’m in a few pools this year so I don’t want to give too much info on where my picks came from this year, or really even what all of them are—I know there are some procrastinators among my competition this year—so I’ll just give a few highlights. Note: These are subject to change until about 12:14 on Thursday….so there’s that.

• Don’t Call It An Upset: (8) Pitt over (1) Gonzaga – Yea, I might be wylin. But have you seen Gonzaga lately? They’ve gotten Gonzaga-er) and Gonzaga-er as the year’s gone by. Did you see the Air Guitar earlier this year against Illinois?

What about the Gonzaga-ness displayed on Selection Sunday?
As Bill Hanstock on SBNation put it, “You want some Gonzaga with that Gonzaga, Gonzaga?” I got Pitt in a 5 – 7 point game.

• Marshall "Mathers" Henderson: (12) Ole Miss over (5) Wisconsin – This most definitely also constitutes as wylin. But hey, Ole Miss just beat Missouri and Florida en route taking the SEC Tournament crown. I know it was only one game that’s gotta mean something. Plus, he gave us arguably the greatest .GIF of the college basketball year.

But I'd also fail you if I didn't mention this...


• Sleeper Team: Illinios. I know, but the wylin just doesn’t stop. I know Illinois has basically no shot at winning this year...but then again, yeah they do. They started the season hot, they’ve beating Indiana, they’ve beaten Ohio State (they also lost to Indiana and Ohio State, but at least they know they can win.) But hey, that’s why they’re my sleeper.
Call it flukey, but the Illini pulled this one off.


• National Champion: I’m keeping this one to myself. All I’ll say is that we all could use a little Sonya Curry in our lives.

I'm just sayin.

March Madness is officially here, BROne Thugs 'N Harmony.

UConn's Women's Team Gives Stanford the Jealous

78 straight wins. A second consecutive National Championship. Seven under Coach Auriemma.

Wow. I don't care if it's women's or men's, tennis or soccer, basketball or lacrosse, that shit is impressive. What UConn's Women's basketball team has managed to do is insane, unheard of and incredible: two back-to-back undefeated championship seasons. It's still hard to believe. Geno Auriemma has to go down as one of the greatest coaches in modern sports history. For real. And shouts to Maya Moore, too. If you're reading this, you really do have the snooks. Congrats on your accomplishments, but not for too long. I know Geno won't allow it.



But for real, congrats.

Duke Wins...Haters Unite

This goes down in history as the first time I've been happy to be wrong...and it will probably be the last. Duke wins, Butler gets jealous'd. All is well in the world.
[Note: In all actuality, I'm happy that Butler made it this far. It's further proof that the tourney should stick to 64 teams to keep Cinderellas alive. They have passed the label of mid-major and I was impressed with their run. Shouts to Gordon Hayward and Avery Jukes who played great games. But #dukies all day.]

awr's March Madness Breakdown: South

You think that last one was a quick post? The South breakdown is as follows:

• South Region Finalist: Louisville. [Sorry Dukies] It hurts but Louisville is built for the Tourney and Edgar Sosa has been playing like he has something to prove. Get past Duke in the second round and it's theirs.
• Upset: Louisville over Cal and over Duke. Yea son.
• Team to Watch: Besides Louisville [obviously] I'd have to say Nova. You can NEVER count out Scottie Reynolds.

And there you have it. My bracket breakdown. If you need any help in these last few hours, refer to these last fours posts. Because, asamp was right.

awr's March Madness Breakdown: West

Aight, I gotta make this quick. It's St. Patrick's Day and I have yet to have a drink. These last two breakdowns are gonna be more like lists:

• West Region Finalist: [Secret Team] All I can say is that it's not Syracuse only due to the injury to Onuaku.
• Upset: UTEP over Butler. I've seen UTEP play a few times and Derrick Caracter is a monster. He really should still be at Louisville still because with him, they'd have the ship on lock this year.
• Team to Watch: UTEP. If they can get past Butler, I think they can really give Vandy a run for their money. Then in a matchup against Syracuse, they'd be the underdog by a mile. With nothing to lose, UTEP could be dangerous.

Aight, one region left: The South

awr's March Madness Breakdown: Midwest

Aight, now for the Midwest Region. Even though it's been debated whether overall number was actually given the easiest road to the Championship, this region was less difficult to pick. Let's get to the Midwest Region:

• Midwest Region Finalist: Kansas

Gotta go with Kanas in the Midwest. There might not be another team in the tourney with as good a balance of experience and talent. Sherron Collins has lived up to the expectations and was able to lead his team to the number 1 overall seed. It's been argued that Kanas' road might not be too easy, but they're still only going to have to possibly play Michigan State, Ohio State or Tennessee, that beat them back in January. All do-able games.

• Upset [If You Can Call it That]: Northern Iowa over UNLV

I mean, these teams are 8 and 9 so they're pretty evenly matched but I've seen Northern Iowa play more than UNLV. Plus, my boy Mase used to play there so I'm giving them the benefit of doubt. #sampshrug

• Teams to Watch: Ohio State and Maryland

The main reasons to watch these two teams are their marquee players, Evan Turner and Greivis Vasquez, respectively. Both of them are good enough to take over a game at any time. And they probably will.

Up next, West Region!

awr's March Madness Breakdown: East

Yes. I'm finally blogging about March Madness. Work has been crazier than ever but I'm finally back. And it's the perfect time. This year is bound to be one of the most unpredictable tournaments in a very long time, so no picks are really too far-fetched. Since I'm participating in like 5 different brackets, I'm only going to post my finalist in each region, my upsets and my team to watch. That might be too much already but whatever. So here's my breakdown of the East:

• East Region Finalist: Kentucky

Even though experience might the most important thing to have going into the tourney, sheer talent might be a close second. I'm looking for the combo of Wall, Cousins and Bledsoe to be the best young tourney team since Melo and the boys in 2003.

• Upset: Cornell over Temple

Most years this seems like a crazy pick but this year is unlike any other. Cornell has a pretty decent game inside and out, highlighted by .434 three point percentage. Hey, you gotta pick upsets somewhere.

• Team to Watch: West Virginia

Really, it's player to watch. Da'Sean Butler has been getting BUSY all year and he pretty much singlehandedly won huge games in the Big East Championship twice. That leads me to believe that if placed in a similar spot in the tourney, he could make it happen again.

I'm not sure what it is but I'm in a really good mood. I always do well in March Madness and some of these brackets are for $$$. Welp, must be the money!

Midwest Region up next!

Hasheem Thabeet Looks Like...

I'm sure that you've heard by now that in an unprecedented move, last years 2nd overall NBA draft pick, Hasheem Thabeet has been demoted to the developmental league. But that's not what this blog post is about. This post is about the one challenge I'm having with Thabeet: trying to figure out exactly what he looks like. So far I've come up with...a lot of things. The most obvious is Jar Jar Binx from Star Wars. Even though the resemblance was closer during his college days, you can still see it a little bit. [And before he cut his hair, Stanley Robinson had the Jar Jar look going.] But I might have figured out where I originally know the Tanzanian center from...he was in an episode of In Living Color! You don't believe me?? Just check it out:

Told you.

Shabba!!

UNC Won. Big Surprise.

Michigan State failed to shock the world last night and got mildly embarrassed by a much better North Carolina team 89-72. [It wasn't as close as the score makes it seem.] This really shouldn't have come as a surprise to anyone...except all of the Michigan State fans that appeared overnight. Again, I'll admit that their run was impressive, but there's not way that they really thought they were going to win last night. It seemed like they were out of the game right after the opening tip. Hansbrough = Yaye. Lawson = Beastly. Ellington = MAN. All three of them had big nights for the Heels, combining for 58 of the Tar Heels' points. Ty Lawson also set a Final Four record with 8 steals on the night. It was never really a game after went up 20 in the first half. Just peep the game flow chart:
The Tar Heels even set an NCAA Tournament record by scoring 55 points in the FIRST HALF, which game them another tournament record by having a 21-point lead at halftime. This marks yet ANOTHER example of a Big Ten team being dominated in a Championship game hahaha. You lose.
And yo, why was Magic Johnson at the game looking healthy as hell?? What AIDS??? Man, Family Guy was right, that nigga is down to one AID.

And for the record, I am neither a UNC fan nor hater. I was mad neutral with this game, but I think it's time to stop hating on Tyler Hansbrough. So he works his ass off, performs at a high level and he gets results. Four-time, First Team All-American, ACC/National Player of the Year, ACC All-Time Career Leading Scorer, and a 'ship. Why the hate?? You can hate the commentators for loving his dirty drawls, and his game might not transfer to the NBA. But that's not his fault.

I guess.

We Are The Champions [Rocafella Edition. Ow.]


[Note: As it turns out, my roommate's math was wrong and I didn't win my bracket after all. But the person who ended up winning didn't pay their money so I get my money back anyway. Haha Owwwwwwww.]

You Know What?? Scratch That. The Bracket Lives. Oww./Burbage Must Pay.

So apparently my bracket isn't exactly T'd. Once my champion, Pitt, let me down against Villanova, I was thinking that I needed Louisville to win the Tournament. But THEN, Michigan State knocked them out. After this, I just assumed that I was out of the money and I went straight into anti-UNC mode. But then my roommate let me know that I was still on track to win the joint. What happened was that during the first few rounds of the Tourney I was able to gain enough points that even now that I only have two of my Final 4 teams remaining, and no more points coming in, I'm still gonna win the bracket. So Burbage, yeah YOU Burbage, you know what that means....GIMME THE LOOT, GIMME THE LOOT!!

Also, two other College Basketball stories that caught my attention:

• Alabama hired former Virginia Commonwealth coach, Anthony Grant, to be their new head basketball coach. He is the first African-American to coach basketball at the University of Alabama. And not only that, he's a really good coach. LSU and Bama both have black head coaches. Why did it take so long?? Georgia might be next...
• UGA's Athletic Director has expressed interest in having Missouri's current head coach, Mike Anderson hold the same position. They haven't officially offered him the job, but it is reported to be at about 2 mil a year if he signs. Owww.
• John Calipari, is a contract-signing away from becoming the head basketball coach at the University of Kentucky. The coach had a meeting with his players earlier this week in which he called Kentucky the "Notre Dame of College Basketball" and as a result, it's looking like he'll be accepting an 8-year, $35 million. Thirty-Five MILLION. He will become the highest paid coach in college basketball if he accepts. I assume he's going to accept.

[Note: And since Burbage is STILL talking about his Tar Heels and STILL annoying me by every thing he does/says, I thought I'd post one of his Spring Break 09 photos. Hope he doesn't mind.]

Yo Burbage...

The First Week of March Madness. Oww.

So everything hasn't gone according to plan with my bracket.

• Wake T'd me. I definitely had them going to the Sweet 16.
• Duke actually decided to play against Texas which kills hurts my Elite 8. Oh well.
• Pitt looked far from beastly in their game against Oklahoma State. Wtf. The only constants were Sam Young dropping 32 and DeJaun Blair's double-double. At least they should smash Xavier on Thursday.

But the one thing that went well was that my Tigers fought til the end against UNC. We started the game off straight but at the end, the bench for North Carolina was just too much. With eight minutes left, the game was tied at 63 but LSU couldn't withstand the 11-0 run by the Tar Heels. All-in-all, good season, boys: SEC Champs, Conference Player and Coach of the Year and a strong showing in the tourney. And I don't care what anyone says, Marcus Thornton should will be a frirst rounder. He gets buckets. And Trent Johnson might look like an ostrich but he really is a great coach.

Three hottest teams right now have to be UConn, 'Cuse and yeah, Duke. Big wins in the last round should give them momentum heading into and through the Sweet 16.

Oh yeah, and USC got beat by Michigan State yesterday. Did anybody peep Lil Romeo on the bench looking concerned towards the end of the game?? Classic.
^ Concerned. ^

March Madness Is Upon Us...Finally

A lot happened during my hiatus for Spring Break 09...mostly a lot of boring ass preseason baseball, Kobe/Lebron/D.Wade playing insane basketball, the epic SIX overtime game between Syracuse and UConn  and the launching of March Madness. F'ing right.

I've been waiting since the end of College Football for March Madness and it's finally here. The best thing about this year is that with no team being able to maintain the #1 ranking during the season, there's no real team that's head-and-shoulders better than everyone else. Here's my short version of my bracket, starting with my Agreements, Disagreements, Surprises and Sleepers:

Agreements:

• The #1 Seeds: I had North Carolina, Louisville and UConn in my Final Four since the beginning of the year so I had to agree with them getting the top spots. My fourth team, Oklahoma got the 2-seed in the South so I'm not too mad.
• I was glad to see that my man Jonny Flynn and 'Cuse got rewarded for their heroic performance in the Big East Tourney by being given the 3-seed in the South. They should be  smooth sailing until the third round against Oklahoma...
• Kansas got the smooth 3-seed in the Midwest despite falling to Baylor in the Big 12 Tournament. They should make it all the way to the Elite 8 against Louisville.
• Cornbread? Ain't nutin wrong with that. (1:29)

Disagreements:

• HOW does LSU get the 8-seed and have to play BUTLER?? I thought that our dominance in the SEC would have been enough to get a more manageable 6- or 7-seed but we get the dreaded 8/9 match up. I was watching the Selection Show mad like:
   But hey, at least it's not a 5/12....

• I don't think Arizona should have made it this year. I'm a Jarryd Bayless fan but he's gone and so is Lute. Finishing the year unranked with a 19-13 record doesn't really scream "NCAA Tournament." It seems like they got in off of past seasons' performances and took a spot away from another deserving team. But that happens every year.
  
• How can you leave out St. Mary's?? The lack of a tough conference schedule isn't really their fault. A 20-6 record (with 3 of the L's coming from Gonzaga) should have been enough to get them in the Big Dance. 

Surprises:

• North Dakota State. After their performance, I'm not surprised they were chosen, just surprised they were able to do it. This was their first year of NCAA Tournament eligibility and they were able to grab a spot. Impressive. Especially when a school like Northwestern has never made the Tourney....even in 71 tries.
• And finally, I don't really agree/disagree about Penn State not making the Tournament, I'm just surprised. The Big 10 was shockingly good this year which made success for all of the teams impossible. 

Sleepers:

• VCU: Eric Maynor is a beast and he's done this before, 
• Siena: a fast, running team, comparable to the Phoenix Suns of the NBA, and 
• LSU: Gotta go with the Tigers...even though they would have the Tar Heels in round two. Oh well, the season was fun while it lasted.

Basically, this year's Tourney is wide open and it should be one of the most enjoyable in recent memory. And when your team loses, I don't want to hear anything. Just stfu. S-T-F-U!!